And sometimes the best one
A few years ago, I signed up for the Ouray 50. When I registered, I reviewed the basics to ensure that this race would have the criteria I wanted: a lot of vertical change. Check ✅. A long duration on my feet. Check ✅. An iconic and beautiful location. Check ✅. Adventure. Check ✅.
Despite my best efforts, I wound up with a DNF because I didn’t make it to mile 35 by the cut off. I could give you a lot of reasons why, but that is not the important part. The important part is that while I failed to finish this race, I am not a failure.
Any race comes with a chance of a DNF. Our finish is never a guarantee – no matter how fit we are, how conscientiously we’ve trained, or how much experience we have. A DNF is often catalogued as a failure. And sure, if we DNF, we failed to finish.
But, we have to be very careful to avoid underestimating the value of failure. On the Ouray site, the race director writes:
“If you want to grow at anything—anything—you have to push the envelope, to step outside of your comfort zone. You have to leave that warm, cozy place where a win is guaranteed. If you want to explore the limits of what you can really do, the only way to do that is to embrace the prospect of failure—or at least act in spite of it. That’s where the magic happens, where you might fail at something, but you just might succeed too and where excitement lives, on that razor edge of uncertainty. That’s where you go if you like the feeling of butterflies in your stomach.
Our society has a distorted view of failure, that you are worthless because you failed. But it’s not that simple. Funny, it’s often not the wins, but the failures that get studied that cause people to reflect, regroup, and come back smarter and stronger. It’s the failures that give us the biggest opportunities to grow. That is my philosophy for this race, for it to be right on the edge of what a normal, non-elite athlete is capable of. It’s designed to be hard and to test you, but also to be doable.”
I have failed many times in my athletic career–including DNFs. Some of those failures I barely remember, and others have stuck with me, a continual reminder that failure is an option–and sometimes the best option for our growth as endurance athletes.
One race is only a moment. But, our lives as endurance athletes go on as long as we have breath to give.
When we adopt the right mindset, failure is a vital part of our long term success. As the saying goes: Fail equals the First (or Fiftieth) Attempt In Learning. We tend to learn much more from our “failures” than we do from our successes.
Where is your focus?
In 2020, I returned to downhill skiing after more than a decade off the slopes. Most days, I focused on how best to not fall. While I didn’t fall much, I also didn’t get much better because I was so risk-averse.
Then, I shifted the focus to the process of skiing. How can I execute quicker turns? What happens when I use my edges in different ways? What is it like in the trees? How can I get through this mogul field? As a consequence, I fell more – but I also got much better.
I could evaluate these moments as failures to execute a turn properly, read the line correctly, or understand how my equipment will work in different types of snow conditions. Or, I could see each fall as a teacher, as an opportunity to get better.
When the No Limits coaches ask you to flip the script, this is what we are encouraging you to do: where is the opportunity in the hard moments, in the “failure”? How can we adjust our focus to see this opportunity and then go for it?
Put your focus on what you want to happen – even if there is a chance you may fail. If there isn’t a chance of failure, you have not set your goals high enough. There should always be an edge of uncertainty to your big dreams.
Reflect and Assess
Make sure to include time for reflection and assessment. This is KEY to success through failure. We may hide from the failure, and bury it deep so no one can see it – especially not ourselves. But, we need to fight this instinct.
Instead, bring that failure into the light and inspect it. No excuses. No justifications. Identify what went well and the errors in execution. Of that list, we need to focus on what is in our control, and ensure that we take steps to control it the next time. If something was out of your control, consider how you can better manage your response next time.
This reflection and assessment should also happen with daily training – not just race day. If a training session goes off the rails, figure out why. What was in your control that could be better executed? Be honest in this reflection, and discuss with your coach.
I am no stranger to this process. I’m not asking you to do anything I don’t do myself – no matter how hard the honest reflections can be.
From 2013 through 2014, I executed 4 different attempts at qualifying for the Ironman World Championships in Kona. I failed in that goal 3 of the 4 times. In each of the 3 failures, I inspected what went right and what went wrong. While the outcome of the race (whether or not I would get the KQ) was never in my control, my work to improve my process in racing 140.6 was always in my control.
From my reflection, I figured out where I lost each race, and more importantly why. I paid attention to what was in my control and then I trained to work on those areas of opportunity. I reflected on my training days (I am a “write a novel for comments” type of athlete). Then, I finally pulled it all together with Ironman Louisville in 2014.
But wait, there’s more…
In 2019, I had my first DNF at the Vermont 100 – a race I had successfully completed before, and a distance I had done multiple times. Experience does not protect us from failure. Nothing does.
Of all my failures, that DNF at the VT100 one stung the worst. But, when I reflected on the race, and honestly assessed what went wrong, I was able to identify some things that were in my control that I could execute better in the future.
Trust me – that reflection was painful for me, but it was worth it.
I’m sharing these stories because too often we celebrate only the successes, and don’t give enough attention to the dark and tumultuous process that took us to that one moment when we shine. My aim is to normalize failure because it is normal.
Embrace Failure
Fear of failure keeps some people from chasing their super secret big dreams. This is the worst failure of all: the failure to try.
If we let the chance of failure keep us from going after our heart’s desire, we will never start anything because failure is always a possibility.
Instead of worrying about “what if I fail,” shift the thought to: “So if I fail, I will learn what there is to learn from that. And, then I will try again.” (Thanks to Dr. Joanne Bullard for this tip to shift the “what if” to the “so if.”)
Failure is not a permanent situation – unless we decide to quit.
In the initial aftermath of failure, our emotions are so raw, it is hard to find the motivation and drive to try again. That’s okay – and that is normal. Wallow in those emotions and process them. BUT – put a time limit on it, for example, 24-48 hours. When that time period is up, the wallowing is done, and it is time to shift back into strategy mode.
Reflect. Assess. Move forward.
Failure is an excellent teacher (perhaps the best there is!), encouraging us to think about problems differently, and to find a different approach to achieve our ultimate goal. Very rarely do we interrogate success. But, we often investigate failure to figure out what went “wrong.” That is when we learn and grow!
Expect and embrace failure as a natural part of the process. While it sucks in the moment, in hindsight that moment of failure may be the precise thing we needed to achieve our goals.
Rely on your coach to help you process failures, and to figure out how to move beyond them. It is okay to ask for time to process a failure. But, when the emotional processing is done, open yourself to taking the new route forward.
When you finally achieve your goal, you will see just how valuable those moments of failure were in the entire journey. This is living life!
You don’t have to process your DNFs, your bad training days, or your setbacks alone. That’s what your No Limits coach is for. Bring us the hard moments — we’ll help you turn them into your next breakthrough. Contact us to set up a free consult.